If life were fair, energy would be an unlimited resource. A nice little renewable wellspring that we could tap into whenever responsibilities start piling up like the world’s most anxiety-inducing game of Jenga.
But life is not fair. Life is a messy, caffeine-fueled, sleep-deprived fever dream where you wake up every morning with a handful of spoons and have to decide whether you’re going to use them on work, basic survival, or answering that one text you’ve been avoiding for three days.
Spoiler alert: There are never enough spoons.
The Work vs. Spoons Ratio (Or, Why I’m Always Tired)
For those unfamiliar with the Spoon Theory, it’s a way of explaining how much energy a person has on any given day, especially for those dealing with chronic illness, mental health struggles, or just an existence that constantly feels like it’s running at 2% battery. You wake up with a limited number of spoons, and everything you do—getting out of bed, working, socializing, even thinking too hard—costs you one.
But here’s the problem: work does not care how many spoons you have left.
Your boss doesn’t care. Deadlines don’t care. That meeting you have in ten minutes? It doesn’t care. And because the world functions on the delusional idea that pushing through exhaustion is a virtue, we don’t even let ourselves care.
We tell ourselves, Just a little more. Just one more task. One more hour. Then I’ll rest. But there’s always something else waiting. And before you know it, you’re staring at your empty spoon drawer while life continues screaming at you to “just push through” as if sheer willpower can magically generate more.
Spoiler alert #2: It cannot.
Responsibilities Don’t Care That You’re Running on Fumes
Here’s the kicker: the world doesn’t pause when you hit empty.
The dishes still need washing. The inbox still needs clearing. The bills still need paying. The pets still need feeding. And the worst part? It never stops.
There is no pause button. No time-out. No benevolent narrator stepping in to say, “And then she got a three-day nap and everything was fine.” Instead, the mental chaos spiral begins:
And I know what some people are thinking: Why don’t you just take a break? Why don’t you “prioritize” better? Why don’t you drink more water?
To which I say: if fixing burnout were as simple as a “self-care day” and a bottle of Fiji, I wouldn’t be writing this.
The Guilt Complex (a.k.a. The Worst Part)
Even when you’re fully aware that you have no spoons left, the guilt creeps in. Because society loves productivity. Society praises the grind. Society tells you that if you’re not working, cleaning, running errands, or otherwise contributing to the machine, you’re somehow failing at life.
So we push ourselves past empty. Again. And again. Until our mental state starts to resemble a Windows error screen—just a bunch of flashing alerts and zero solutions.
Here’s the sickest part of all of it: even when you know you need a break, you don’t feel like you deserve one.
Because somewhere along the way, we internalized this idea that rest is a reward instead of a necessity. That stopping means slacking. That if you aren’t doing something “useful,” then you’re wasting time.
And that? That’s a load of absolute bullshit.
So What’s the Fix?
Honestly? I wish I had a magic answer. A secret hack. A button that dispenses extra spoons like a Pez dispenser. But the best I’ve got is this:
- Prioritize like your sanity depends on it. Because it does. Not everything deserves a spoon. Learn to say no. Let the dishes sit. Put yourself first.
- Stop pushing past empty. Your body and brain will force a shutdown if you don’t take breaks. It’s not weakness; it’s survival.
- Tell the guilt to shut up. Productivity is not your worth. You are not a machine. You are a human being who deserves rest. Period.
- Delegate. Cut corners. Half-ass things if you have to. The world won’t end if your emails are a little shorter or you order takeout instead of cooking. You are not required to do everything, all the time, at 100%.
- Remind yourself that you don’t have to earn rest. You don’t need to justify a nap. You don’t have to “finish one more thing” before you let yourself breathe. Your body needs rest. Your brain needs rest. That’s not indulgence. That’s basic maintenance.
Because at the end of the day, no amount of work, responsibilities, or guilt is worth running yourself into the ground. And if life refuses to give you more spoons, you have every right to use what little you have on you.
